I've come to dread Saturdays - NOT because they're my weekly deadline for new work, and NOT because you'll find me racing around the house shouting 'OH, FUCK, I NEED A STORY!' at 11:59 PM on Friday night. I live in fear of the weekend because of the journal entry involved (for real, serious!).
It's been eating at me for months now, which is ironic to say the least since I used to maintain an on-line journal and had no trouble updating the fucking thing on a daily basis. Friday comes, I usually don't have anything ready or even thought of, but I'm biting my nails over what to say in the goddamn UPDATE rather than the non-existent story.
Thanks to being neurotically focused on work (which is working, by the way) and trying to keep grief capped as best as possible (which isn't working as well) any and all free time is spent in sheer exhaustion. It's hard enough to write an update when I just don't have the drive, it's a million times worse when I'm so fucking depressed that I spontaneously burst into tears when grocery shopping.
I was less than thrilled when faced with the prospect of leaving my crudely constructed tent-bed just to write an entry last week, so R agreed to cover my ass. Which is, I guess, a natural progression regarding his involvement with this site since he's written a lot of the non-update site text, edits all of my work, and answers my email when I'm busy.
After listening to me complain for the billionth time about writing the update since Thursday, he graciously offered to reprise his editor-in-chief role. I ALMOST took him up on the offer, but then declined at the last second - I didn't want people to think I was just too fucking lazy to update myself for a second week in a row.
The truth of the matter is ALANA'S GETTING VERY BUSY. Work tends to be all consuming, so I'm forever fighting an 'all or nothing!' battle, with the first almost always winning. I understand that these updates embody the last TANGIBLE presence of myself on the site, so I promise that I'll make genuine effort to continue updating whenever I can.
I'd just like to point out that R updating for me isn't a BAD THING but a VERY GOOD THING. It means that I'm A, being productive and B, you're getting your weekly fix on time and without all of the personal bullshit that I need to include to have this site listed as a 'weblog' in various directories.
While the transition of duties will be gradual I wanted to assure you guys that the shift will be for the better. I'll still be around in one form or another, and you guys will always have the ability to contact me whenever you want. This is just one of those unfortunate realties that was inevitable once I started taking my career seriously (I'm 25 and a grown-up now!).
Now that the formality's out of the way I can concentrate on more important things, like this week's new story.
Are you sitting down? Your bladder's not full, is it? Good, because I'm going to say the single most thrilling thing you'll ever hear (no, not 'I SCANNED MY BOOBS FOR YOU AND HERE'S THE URL!' or even 'I'VE JUST GAINED OWNERSHIP OF SMALL SLAVIC COUNTRY - COME OVER AND BE MY PRIME MINISTER!').
This week's story introduces A BRAND NEW CHARACTER (OMG!)! Not only is she a NEW CHARACTER but she's the FIRST new character of this year (OMFG!)! It's about fucking time, too, since we're already five months into 2005 and at least a quarter of the updates so far have involved Ms Spastic Extraordinaire (Aspasia).
Angela's relatively new but somehow managed to make an appearance in a story years ago (Park & Ride) despite not having a complete character history (dude, that sort've shit takes YEARS!). Having always focused on more developed characters she got lost on the sidelines, so she must've bribed / killed / stolen someone's shoes to have been able to pop in my head earlier this week.
The choice was totally unexpected, then again every story for the last month has been unplanned and written at the last second. Although it's interesting to note that these stories seem to 'inspire' the character for next week (i.e., Rhiannon in Road Trip and then again in One Favour, the story after featuring Melanie who mentioned Angela in On the House, and now Angela in Good Catholic).
I'm not going to bother going into Angela's history since I think I covered the bases in the story (make sure you hit up On the House and Park & Ride for a further glimpse into the character). I told R that she's supposed to be a nastier mix of Jerusalem and Melanie, so it was something of a surprise when an almost EVIL personality came through. I was going less for CHILD OF SATAN than unapologetically self-centered, but you be the judge of how that worked out.
I felt like I struggled with the pacing towards the end, but that largely has to do with the style of the story (and me being 'crazy' and 'insane' and 'stupid'). I suppose in reality I'm still trying to get a better grip on this narration thing, so things aren't as comfortable as they used to be. It almost feels like I'm relearning how to write. I was told that the story was much stronger than last week's story (On the House), which I thought was a super huge amazing big breakthrough.
As much as I love all my girls I can't help but feel a tiny spark of excitement with the notion that I have something that resembles a proper villain (at least one I can write about without divulging future plans). I don't think I'd be remiss in saying that I expect Angela to reappear in the near future, provided her saintly presence stays in the back of my mind.
To meet Benway Bunnies' newest character, Angela, simply click here. Or you can go the long route and locate the story in the Misc. Sexy Girls section of Fiction. You'll find Good Catholic under the 2005 header. For more Angelaness, be sure to hit up Park & Ride and On the House.
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